' Mom.....where are you? '

I was always tired when I came home from my 2nd job, but I was always faithful in reading the bible.
At this time of my life, I was a Christian for at least 3 years and I was growing spiritually. I had peace
and I was content on what I had. I had a family (wife and son), income, and a growing relationship
with Christ. However, with the presence of bills, rent, and an unreliable car, I was stressed at times.

It was almost 12:30 in the morning and in my head, I was counting how many hours I was going to
"1-2-3-4-5.....Well, I'm going to be tired and I'll need to be at work by 7"  I said to myself. So, I
opened my bible to Luke.

I was almost done reading the gospel of Luke (NIV) when suddenly... like a dark cloud, I was
covered with a cold heavy wet blanket of loneliness. The back of my throat began to ache as I
starred endlessly at my bible . Then my vision became blurred with tears as  I caught myself saying  
Mom, where are you? ............Mom............................I need you."

It had been about 4 years when we buried our mom on that cold February day. She had a sudden
stroke and she went into a coma. For 2 days, she laid there entangled in the ICU room. Then my
sisters, my younger brother, and I felt that this is something that  my mom did not want. So, we
decided not to be selfish and allowed the life support system to be turned off. Surprisingly, her
funeral was not a sad one, to me anyways. It was rather a 'happy' funeral. She went to be with God
and my mom did not have to suffer anymore headaches. I use to see my mom bumping her temples
with the edge of her palms everyday when I came home from school and all I could do was quietly
slide into my room.

Now, I was in my mid 20s and I was missing my mom. "
Mom.....where are you? " I knew where she
was at. She was in heaven and I was here on Earth, going through life......without a mom. Sure I had
my dad, but he was a passive father. And now that my mom was gone, he became even more
" Mom...where are you?.......I need you Mom......I need your help......... Mom........Mom
....................................I miss you. "

I do not know how long I sat there with the bible open. I was too deep into my realization of how
much I really missed my mom. Then finally, I looked down, readjusted my glasses and wiped away
my tears. I started reading from where I left off from the night before.

" On the first day of the week, very early in the morning, the women took the spices they had prepared
and went to the tomb. They found the stone rolled away from the tomb, but when they entered, they did
not find the body of the Lord Jesus. While they were wondering about this, suddenly two men in
clothes that gleamed like lightning stood beside them. In their fright the women bowed down with their
faces to the ground, but the men said to them, Why do you look for the living among the dead?"

What?...That last sentence caught me off guard and I had to read that again! " Why do you look for
the living among the dead? ".
I sat up and read that again. " Why do you look for the living among
the dead? "
. Then finally, I heard. " Why are you looking for your mom among the dead? She is with
me. "
And just like that, the cold heavy wet blanket of loneliness lifted. What an awesome
experience that was, one minute I was throwing myself a pity party, then the next, I was rejoicing.  

It is amazing when God speaks to you in that right moment. Especially, when that right moment is
when you need comforting the most.

I am at full peace now, and I am looking forward in seeing my mom again. ...............I cannot wait.

So, if you have a loved one that has gone to be the Lord and you missed them very, very much. Let
me encourage you and say. "Why are you looking for the living among the dead?". Jesus is coming
soon and therefore, you will be reunited with your love one.

        In their fright the women bowed down with their faces to the ground, but the men said to
    them, “Why do you look for the living among the dead? He is not here; he has risen! Remember
    how he told you, while he was still with you in Galilee:
    Luke 24:5,6 NIV

With blessings,
Bro. Yazzie